The fine fine between good and bad authenticity in leadership (remember the crying CEO?)

Introduction

Authenticity in leadership is highly sought after, yet complex to navigate. Leaders are encouraged to be transparent, vulnerable, and true to themselves. However, there are both effective and ineffective ways to demonstrate authenticity, especially in high-stakes situations. One of the most debated examples of this is the "crying CEO" incident—a cautionary tale about the risks of mismanaging authentic expression.

In this article, we’ll explore the right and wrong ways to show authenticity as a leader, and how this affects trust, leadership credibility, and company culture.

Good Ways to Show Authenticity as a Leader

1. Purposeful Vulnerability

   • Sharing personal challenges can humanize a leader, fostering a more open and trusting environment. However, vulnerability must serve a purpose beyond seeking sympathy. For example, sharing a failure and how it shaped your leadership approach can inspire your team to take risks and learn from mistakes.

2. Consistency Between Words and Actions

   • Authentic leaders align their behaviors with their values. If you advocate for work-life balance, lead by example and respect your own time off. Any inconsistency between what you say and what you do can damage trust with your team.

3. Open, Honest Communication

   • Communicate transparently about successes, challenges, and company direction. Even when delivering tough news, being upfront maintains credibility and fosters a sense of inclusion among team members.

4. Empathy and Active Listening

   • True authenticity involves deeply understanding your team’s perspectives. Leaders who listen and act on feedback build stronger, more loyal relationships, cultivating an environment where employees feel valued.

Bad Ways to Show Authenticity as a Leader

1. Over-Sharing Personal Issues

   • While vulnerability is important, leaders must avoid sharing too many intimate details that blur professional boundaries. Your team doesn’t need to know every aspect of your personal life, and oversharing can erode the respect necessary to lead effectively.

2. Inconsistent Behavior

   • Saying one thing and doing another, such as inviting open feedback but reacting negatively to criticism, creates distrust. Authenticity requires consistency—if you say you value transparency, your actions must reflect that.

3. Using Vulnerability for Manipulation

   • Vulnerability is a powerful tool, but using it to manipulate or gain sympathy can backfire. Leaders who overuse personal struggles to excuse poor decisions or performance risk being perceived as inauthentic or even disingenuous.

4. Public Displays of Emotion Without Context

   • Public emotional displays—whether anger, sadness, or frustration—can make team members uncomfortable if not properly contextualized. While showing emotion is human, leaders must be mindful of timing and appropriateness.

The Case of the "Crying CEO"

In a viral incident, CEO Braden Wallake posted a tearful selfie on LinkedIn after laying off two employees. His post was intended to show vulnerability, but it backfired spectacularly. Critics called him tone-deaf, accusing him of making the layoffs about his personal emotional experience rather than the employees who lost their jobs.

Where It Went Wrong:

• Misplaced Focus: The post shifted attention from the affected employees to the CEO’s feelings, which many saw as self-centered.

• Inappropriate Platform: A tearful selfie on LinkedIn, a professional platform, was viewed as an inappropriate way to communicate such a serious matter.

• Lack of Action: While Wallake expressed regret, there was little follow-up to show how he was helping his former employees, making his emotion seem performative rather than constructive.

Lessons Learned

1. Keep the Focus on Others: In tough situations, your authenticity should focus on how you’re supporting your team, not on how the situation affects you personally.

2. Think Before You Share: Public displays of emotion, especially on professional platforms, require careful thought. Leaders should consider how their message will be received.

3. Follow Up with Actions: Authentic words need to be backed by concrete actions. If you express vulnerability about a tough decision, also share what you’re doing to address the consequences.

Conclusion: Striking the Right Balance

Authentic leadership, when done well, can build strong, trusting teams and create positive organizational cultures. However, leaders need to strike a delicate balance—ensuring their vulnerability doesn’t overstep professional boundaries or come across as performative. Leaders who master this balance are better equipped to inspire, motivate, and lead with integrity.